Gen Z, Your Vagina is Fine!
Stop beating around the bush
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Forgive me—I should have used the word vulva not vagina, but I had to get your attention because this is important. We’ll talk about why, as a culture, we insist on using the wrong term in a second, but for now let’s focus on the ways girls are “empowered” to fix their “vaginas”.
Pubic Hairstyles, Surgery, and Vaginal Washes, Oh My!
As Sarah Hildebrandt writes in The EmBodyment of American Culture, “the more clothes women were ‘allowed’ (or expected) to remove, the more hair they were also expected to remove.” When bikinis became a thing in 1946, styling our pubes became popular. The trend since then has moved from trimming of bikini lines to the whole enchilada, naked as a baby’s, except for a short stint in the 1970s when even porn stars sported full bushes. Sixty-two percent of all women have opted for complete removal of their pubic hair at some point with higher percentages among younger women aged eighteen to thirty-four.
Until Sex and the City’s infamous Brazilian wax episode in 2000 prompted a movement, this was the stuff of fetishes. Girls today tell me that preparing their genitals is serious business. Do I want a skinny landing strip or a thicker Mohawk? Postage stamp or Bermuda Triangle? One college-age patient explained vajazzling to me after the crystals glued to her shaved mons pubis cut her up during sex. Like shaving our legs and armpits, full frontal waxing is now, ironically, a rite of passage to adulthood. Girls say they think it’s prettier, cleaner, and what boys want. Well, given the ubiquity of porn, it’s certainly what boys expect.
The circumscribed beauty we chase requires maddening replicability, and vulvas are no exception. Without pubic hair, girls are better able to see and evaluate how closely their vulvas match their perceptions of normal vulvas. The airbrushed images girls see online don’t represent the variations of shape, color, size and asymmetry of normal vulvas. Instead, girls believe, not unlike the rest of their bodies, their vulvas should appear prepubescent and take up as little space as possible. Enter designer vagina surgery or Vaginal Rejuvenation (is that like a yoga retreat for your vagina without the radical self-acceptance?). Cosmetic vaginal surgery increased 262% between 2012 and 2018. A huge spike among teenagers(!) prompted the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists in 2016 to issue guidelines to doctors urging them to educate and reassure patients, suggest nonsurgical alternatives for comfort and appearance, and screen them for body dysmorphic disorder.
The trope that vulvas are ugly and unclean has also led to a host of products for “fixing” them, targeting young women, and especially women of color. Like a game of Whack-A-Mole, when one unnecessary, sometimes harmful, vaginal product is whacked down—think douches and carcinogenic baby powder—another pops up. Cleansing wipes, “minty fresh” herbal menstrual pads (which some girls say feels like putting icy hot down there), panty sprays, and supplements for “urinary tract support” are trending on TikTok. As the New York Times (also using ‘vagina’ instead of ‘vulva in its headline) highlighted many of these items are produced by women-owned companies who want to offer real talk about vaginal health. They market their period products showing embarrassing or painful moments instead of women running through fields of daisies; they use red liquid instead of the traditional blue used by big pharma. These companies mean well, but they themselves are a product of a sexist, racist culture that promotes the idea that menstruation and vulvas are gross. Old stigma, new packaging.
Here’s What You (and Your Daughter) Should Know
There is nothing wrong with your vaginas!
They look fine.
They smell fine.
They taste fine.
They are fine, as is.
Cleaning the vulva
Gynecologists have long been telling women their vulvas do not need to and probably should not be exposed to herbs and essential oils. The vagina is a self-cleaning organ and the pH in the vagina can be altered by any foreign substance that’s introduced into it. So think twice about what enters the vagina to avoid disrupting its protective environment. Scents can irritate the area and will only serve as a mask to cover up an actual issue that might be causing odor. Thankfully, maintaining good vaginal hygiene is incredibly simple. All you need is water. You can use a mild soap on the area surrounding the vagina—the vulva—but soap can cause irritation and infections so keep it away from the internal part.
Styling the vulva
Doctors suggest leaving at least a little bit of hair around the vaginal opening because the skin there is sensitive and hair helps wick away sweat and bacteria from entering the vagina. That’s why prepubescent girls have higher incidents of vaginal irritation. Some researchers believe a bare vulva may also make girls more susceptible to sexually transmitted infections (STIs). Those who remove hair can also have grooming-related infections, lacerations and allergic reactions. No matter how you cut it (so to speak), hair removal leaves microscopic wounds.
Shaming the vulva
It's heartbreaking that the organs of the vulva, which allow for something as basic as urinating, as vital as reproduction, and as fundamental as pleasure are tethered to shame and scrutinized so uncharitably. Perhaps it’s not surprising that the anatomical term for vulva is pudenda membra, from the Latin word pudere, meaning “to be ashamed”. Check out with your kids All Vulvas are Beautiful to see a wide variety of vulvas, made by the folks at Netflix's Sex Education and Vulva Gallery. (Btw, Sex Education is well worth watching, if you haven’t already, though I didn’t love the final season.)
This is What Empowerment Looks Like
Look, I don’t really care what anyone does with or to their vulvas. I only care that they have a choice. I say do what makes you happy, but be mindful of the forces at work “empowering” you to change your vulva. Empowerment does not mean spending money on products and services you don’t need for a body part you’re inaccurately naming. Empowerment is knowing the vagina is the internal canal that leads from the uterus to the outside of the body, and the vulva is the visible part of the genitals—the urethra, clitoris, labia and vaginal opening. But because we live in a male-centric culture that cares only about the part where the penis goes in and the baby comes out, we incorrectly call the whole thing the vagina. (Here’s a straightforward 2-minute video explaining the difference between the vulva and the vagina).
Empowerment is knowing how your body works and what it responds to. It’s exploring all the possibilities of pleasure and orgasm independently and/or with a partner. It is knowing your body is perfectly fine just the way it is.
If you liked this post, then you might want to follow…
Board certified gynecological surgeon, Karen Tang on Instagram. She’s hilarious, knowledgeable, and busting patriarchal myths about women’s bodies one post at a time. Aaaand, I just noticed she’s starting here on Substack so you can subscribe to
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This is my MOST POPULAR POST EVER with over 50,000 views (originally published on TheFeministParent.com but now on Substack):
